Seeking Higher

Well, it is almost that time, time to go back to school.  I remember those days back in high school when I dreamed that I only had four more years and I would be done with school forever...yeah...until I realized that I love learning.  By halfway through college if someone came up to me and told me that they would pay me to just go to school forever, I would have been cool with that. But I graduated and determined to move on with life.  I had thoughts then of getting an MBA, even started the application process a couple of times, but it never seemed to be the right time.  Two years ago today I moved 4 hours north of the hometown I had lived in for almost 24 years with a plan to work.

About 6 months ago working just wasn't cutting it for me.  I needed more.  I wasn't progressing in directions that I wanted too.  I looked at my 26 year old self and saw that I was neither married nor had I realized that thought of getting my MBA.  As I had very little control over the one, the other became my focus.  I wrestled with the idea and finally came to the conclusion that there was no better time in my life than now for me to continue my education.  I was accepted into a Professional MBA program and while apprehensive about the cost of the program and the work load it would be to work full time and go to school, I was excited.

The closer the starting date has come the more excited and apprehensive I have become.  Seeking solace in the scriptures I found the answers to calm my anxious mind in Doctrine and Covenants 88:118-126

118 And as all have not faith, seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith.
119 Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house, even a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God;
120 That your incomings may be in the name of the Lord; that your outgoings may be in the name of the Lord; that all your salutations may be in the name of the Lord, with uplifted hands unto the Most High.
121 Therefore, cease from all your light speeches, from all laughter, from all your lustful desires, from all your pride and light-mindedness, and from all your wicked doings.
122 Appoint among yourselves a teacher, and let not all be spokesmen at once; but let one speak at a time and let all listen unto his sayings, that when all have spoken that all may be edified of all, and that every man may have an equal privilege.
123 See that ye love one another; cease to be covetous; learn to impart one to another as the gospel requires.
124 Cease to be idle; cease to be unclean; cease to find fault one with another; cease to sleep longer than is needful; retire to thy bed early, that ye may not be weary; arise early, that your bodies and your minds may be invigorated.
125 And above all things, clothe yourselves with the bond of charity, as with a mantle, which is the bond of perfectness and peace.
126 Pray always, that ye may not faint, until I come. Behold, and lo, I will come quickly, and receive you unto myself. Amen.

Among these verses was a call to action for me.  I finally saw the reason Heavenly Father thought a master's degree would be good for me.  There were so many thoughts that entered my mind with these verses, I hope you allow me literary license to point out just a few.

"And as all have not faith..."

I work for the church.  The group of friends I spend time with come mostly from wards I have been in over the last two years.  I don't know my neighbors well and I live in Utah where missionary work seems that much harder.  Yet, this first part of verse 118 struck me as I realized the truth of that statement: not everyone has faith.  I am sure not all of the colleague in my program are going to be members of the church, and even if they are, they may need additional faith as we all do.  The rest of the verse invites us to seek diligently for and teach one another words of wisdom from the best books.  Even as I have begun to read some of my required texts I have been amazed at the principles I am learning that will help me in my work, my schooling, and my calling.  I am anxious to see how the Lord helps me mold these principles into my life to make me more effective in my life and I can't wait to see the opportunities he will give me to share the things I am learning with others, strengthening their faith primarily in the principles, but also in the Lord's promise to help those who are diligent in sharing their talents.  I foresee many opportunities to share the Gospel here.

"Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish...a house of God."

The discipline this program will take is going to be on level with what I needed on my mission. I will be working Monday through Friday, 8am to 5pm.  Tuesday and Thursday I will go from work at 5pm to class at 6pm.  Class gets out around 10pm and I make the 30 minute drive home.  Monday's will be Family Home Evening, every other Wednesday is Temple night, and Sunday is a day of rest.  This leaves me with before and after Family Home Evening, every other Wednesday, Friday and Saturday, and whatever I can cram in on the bus to and from work to complete the recommended 16 hours of out of class study time, meals, laundry, etc.  I would be fooling myself if I were to say that I am looking forward to it...more like I am looking forward to being done already.  Yet, I am grateful for the promise of these verses.  When everything is organized and prepared with prayer and fasting, etc., a house of God develops.  The house of God is often thought of as the temple and we know from 1 Corinthians 3:16 that our bodies are temples of God.  As that house of God develops it becomes a place where the Spirit of the Lord dwells and where the Spirit dwells miracles happen.  

Organizing has often been a good quality of mine...but only when I have time and never in my bedroom which is too often cluttered.  Obviously these verses were a wake up call to me, but I know that as I organize and discipline my life that my schedule will not seem so hindered and that the Lord will help me meet the deadlines imposed in my schooling and work.  Hopefully that means I'll be able to find time for a little bit of a social life too.

"That all may be edified of all..."

This piece was a reminder to seek counsel and listen.  Doctrine and Covenants 88:122 instructs us to appoint a teacher, a leader, who does not allow all to speak at once that nothing is heard, but rather that each be given an opportunity to voice their thoughts, opinions, and understandings "that all may be edified of all."  I am grateful for the educational journey I am about to embark on where teachers have been appointed and where I will have the opportunity to be part of a group where I may learn from many types of people from many different backgrounds.  This verse is also an important reminder that I am not the only knowledgeable person in the program and that I may not always have the best understanding or the right answers.  It is important in a classroom setting as well as in the world to remember to listen to all options and make educated decisions.  We all have something we can give, the gift of our point of view, the gift of our knowledge, or the gift of our experience.  I am anxious to receive these gifts of others and give them my own that we might not be in constant conflict, but rather that we might grow together in wisdom and understanding.

"Cease..."

Cease is a strange word and not one you hear outside of legal or scriptural language and that adds to its power.  Verses 123 and 124 give us five things we must "cease", we must stop doing, we must remove from our lives: "Cease to be covetous...cease to be idle; cease to be unclean; cease to find fault one with another; cease to sleep longer than is needful..."  These definitely fall in line with organizing and preparing, but they also have much to do with being an "agent unto oneself".  I love the verse in Doctrine and Covenants 58:28--

"For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves.  And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their reward."

Learning to "cease" a behavior takes a lot of the discipline I discussed before, but ceasing to be idle and to sleep more than is necessary, that can be even harder.  The saying "the heart is willing but the flesh is weak" comes to mind when I consider a blissful Saturday morning "catching up" on my sleep.  The truth is that each of these sins comes from an unwillingness to overcome a desire of the flesh.  The natural man always wants what they can't have, would rather be on the couch than out serving, typically lives in a sty and seeks lustful desires, always blames the other person for their own failings, and would much rather sleep the day away than do anything productive.  But a person like that isn't happy.  It will be really easy some days to say, "I don't want to get up and do homework, I'm going to watch TV instead."  As a master procrastinator, I know this verse was another call to action.  I am grateful for the promise of power to those who cease bad habits and become active agents in their own lives.  It is power to do and create, power to serve and lift, and that power, used properly, will bring happiness to the agents using it.

"Pray Always, that ye may not faint..."

I recently took up memorizing scriptures again.  One of the first I memorized was Doctrine and Covenants 10:5 -- 

"Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea, that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work."

Verse 126 of Doctrine and Covenant 88 asks us to pray until the Savior comes and reminds us that He will come quickly.  This could be taken literally as we know the second coming is coming quickly according to his time table, but it is also a promise to those who pray for strength, help, and guidance.  How grateful am I that when we pray always He quickly comes to our aid that we may not faint, that we may not fall into the hands of Satan, that we may conquer our trials and become stronger through His strength.

To end, I ask for your prayers.  No use being selfish here, I know I am going to need all the help I can get! I am so grateful for my supportive family, friends, coworkers, and especially to my Heavenly Father who I know hasn't put me on this path to fail, but to learn, grow, and succeed.

These are things I have learned from this scripture in this time of my life as I begin on a different course than I imagined I would be on 7 years ago as a high school graduate.  But I am not the only one who can learn from these verses.  We are all at different points in our life where the counsel in these verses is needed.  I invite you to share your insights with me and other readers in the comments below.  I look forward to being edified by you!

Therefore, Cheer Up!

"Therefore, cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves—to choose the way of everlasting death or the way of eternal life."       2 Nephi 10:23

"Remember, to be carnally-minded is death, and to be Spiritually-Minded Is Life Eternal" 2 Nephi 9:39

The purpose of this post is to remind you to SMILE! I'm almost positive Heavenly Father laughed a bit at how clever he was in wording 2 Nephi 9:39 the way he did. In case you haven't gotten it yet, the acronym of those last 5 words spells SMILE! Heavenly Father gave us that hint: those who are spiritually minded smile more for those who are spiritually minded truly have reason to smile.

Life isn't easy, but after a difficult week dealing with a cold, too much work, and not enough sleep, I was grateful for this reminder. I was just just as grateful for the verse I found in the next chapter: "Therefore, cheer up your hearts! And remember that ye are free to act for yourselves." 

The gift of choice (or agency) is the most precious gift our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ could give us. They, as loving parent and older brother, knew that no one can tell, coerce, threaten, or force a free spirit to be happy. True happiness, true joy, is one of those emotions that cannot be mimicked, copied, or given away. The first part of that verse became a theme for me over the next week and whenever I was tempted to be upset or grumpy I reminded myself: "Therefore, cheer up!" 

What an interesting phrase, cheer UP. It isn't cheer down, around, or through. We are to cheer UP! Up towards the blue sky above the clouds, up towards our Heavenly Father, cheer UP! I recalled a similar phrase in preparation for this blog post from Sister Wirthlin, mother of apostle, Joseph B. Wirthlin: "Come what may and love it." I reread his talk from October 2008 and caught hold of this message as well:

"The next time you’re tempted to groan, you might try to laugh instead. It will extend your life and make the lives of all those around you more enjoyable." -Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

This was an important lesson I would need to be reminded of just a few days later. Projects and missed deadlines plagued the next couple of days and when that was finished I had to deal with the growing number of emails in my inbox, unending phone calls, and put out the fires I left burning too long. And just when the most mediocre of days was over and I was on my way home to go to the House of the Lord I got off the bus to find my keys gone (left on my desk at work), the spare knocked from the underbelly of my car, and to make matters worse I got a "fortune" from a fortune cookie telling me to do my chores. It isn't an uncommon occurrence for stressful situations to bring tears to my eyes and as my wonderful roommate pulled up to take me home I was almost to that point. 

Then I stopped. 

I reversed my train of thought, found the humor in the situation and was blessed with a wonderful feeling of gratitude. In addition to a great roommate willing to drive a few extra miles, she lent me her car do get to the temple that night. Two or three people were willing to pick me up, and my boss even double checked to make sure that my keys were actually left on my desk where I thought they were. I laughed at the blond hairs that I blamed for the situation and shook my finger at the dark cloud above me (literally--it was quite overcast that day...) that was trying to get me down as if to say, "Not this time!". I knew that the Lord would provide a way and that tomorrow would be better. 

Not every time I'm faced with such things am I so able to brush it off. Sometimes I do cry and there is no one to console me, sometimes there isn't a friend to give me a hug (or a ride) when I need it, but never has my agency been taken from me, I have always had a choice. I can choose to live only in that moment and let it get me down, or I can choose to cheer up! 

I don't remember when I first discovered this truth, but it was sometime when I really began to understand the meaning of my name: Joy. True joy comes through making good choices and one of those is choosing to be happy. I didn't always like my name, but for anyone who knows me now, I try very hard to live up to it and use it in the cheesiest ways possible...why else would this blog be rightfully name "My Joyous Pursuit of Happiness"?  This is my motto: "Happiness is a Choice".  Choose happiness, choose joy, choose to look UP and cheer UP, choose to SMILE!  

And when choosing to smile becomes difficult just watch the video at the top again.

Count Your Many Trials

It seems that when I am in need of learning a particular lesson, that lesson is taught every where.

I first recognized this lesson as I was reading in 1 Nephi 18:11-16

 11 And it came to pass that Laman and Lemuel did take me and bind me with cords, and they did treat me with much harshness; nevertheless, the Lord did suffer it that he might show forth his power, unto the fulfilling of his word which he had spoken concerning the wicked.

 12 And it came to pass that after they had bound me insomuch that I could not move, the compass, which had been prepared of the Lord, did cease to work.

 13 Wherefore, they knew not whither they should steer the ship, insomuch that there arose a great storm, yea, a great and terrible tempest, and we were driven back upon the waters for the space of three days; and they began to be frightened exceedingly lest they should be drowned in the sea; nevertheless they did not loose me.

 14 And on the fourth day, which we had been driven back, the tempest began to be exceedingly sore.

 15 And it came to pass that we were about to be swallowed up in the depths of the sea. And after we had been driven back upon the waters for the space of four days, my brethren began to see that the judgments of God were upon them, and that they must perish save that they should repent of their iniquities; wherefore, they came unto me, and loosed the bands which were upon my wrists, and behold they had swollen exceedingly; and also mine ankles were much swollen, and great was the soreness thereof.

I pondered on these verses a bit and considered what that must have been like for them.  A large boat carrying your entire family and because of the choices of a few, all could have lost their lives.  Nephi must have felt so powerless at that time, and may have wondered why his righteousness seemed to count for nothing when the lives of his parents, wife, and children were at stake.  My thoughts were then drawn to another group of people and their trip to the promised land.

The Brother of Jared and his party seemed to have it so much easier than Nephi.  None of the Jaredites were perfect, but they were not utterly rebellious as Nephi's brother's were.  They had a couple problems, getting enough air and lighting the inside of their barges, but once done the Lord simply blew them across the ocean to the Promised Land.

However, circumstances changed when I imagined in my head the following conversation between Nephi and the Brother of Jared in paradise as they  compared their experiences getting to the promised land. (Please excuse my modernization...it made the conversation more fun in my head. :-) )

Nephi: Dude, you had it so easy!  All those people were willing to help you build your barges, and they were tight! You didn't even need to build any system to steer them with since you just got blown across the sea.  After you and Heavenly Father figured out the lighting issues, you were home free!  It took a chapter's worth of lecturing to get Laman and Lemuel to help me build a boat.  Thank heaven I had a little help from God in figuring out a steering mechanism!  But then we get on the water and what do they do?  They tie me up!  Four days like that before they finally released me and we could move onward.  You were so blessed that you didn't have brothers like mine.

Brother of Jared: Easy?  You think I had it easy?  It took 8 years and a severe lecture from Heavenly Father before we even started building the barges.  And do you realize it took us 344 days to get there.  Have you ever tried being cooped up in a barge with people, animals, and honey bees for 344 days?  Then there was the tossing and the burying in the waters.  I swear, we wouldn't have made it if it weren't for the fact that we kept praying and praising the Lord.

Nephi: Wow, I guess that is true...you really didn't have it much easier, did you?  You know what else we have in common though?  We both were able to get through our trials because we prayed and praised the Lord.  Man, Heavenly Father is great, isn't He?

Brother of Jared: Dude, He's God!

Nevertheless, I did look unto my God, and I did praise him all the day long; and I did not murmur against the Lord because of mine afflictions.--1 Nephi 18:16

As I read this verse in 1 Nephi 18, my perspective really changed.  It wasn't for the punishment of the wicked that Heavenly Father sent these two prophets through the trials he did, is was for the testing and blessing of the righteous.  Heavenly Father knew that Laman and Lemuel weren't going to change.  While they were tossed on the water Heavenly Father could have easily stopped Laman and Lemuel as he had before.  He could have sent an angel, spoken to them, given Nephi the strength to break his bands, shocked them, or even just thrown them overboard.  I'm sure Nephi prayed for anything to save his family.  After four days I'm sure my patience would have been running low.  Yet as soon as he was released he didn't waste time lecturing his brothers or murmuring that it took the Lord long enough; He immediately looked to God and praised him.  

Wait, he praised him?  For allowing him to be tied up for four days during a horrible storm?  For allowing his father, the prophet, and his mother to get so sick they almost died?  For making him watch his wife and children beg and plead for his release?  After all that, Nephi still praised the Lord?

What I have missed all along is that this wasn't a test for Laman and Lemuel to see how long it would take them to break down.  This was a test for Nephi to see if after all he would recognize the blessings of the Lord.

And it came to pass after they had loosed me, behold, I took the compass, and it did work whither I desired it. And it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord; and after I had prayed the winds did cease, and the storm did cease, and there was a great calm.

Looking at others, the journey may seem easy, but for many of the righteous, the blessings can be just as uncomfortable as Nephi's.  Do we look at others' trials and wonder why we were so stricken with our own?  Sometimes its losing a child or parent, watching a friend or family member struggle through alcohol or drug use or with mental illness.  For some it is the trial of never being married, for others it is finding the person they married isn't the person they thought they were and getting divorced.  For others it is watching parents part ways.  Some have financial difficulty, other just bad luck.  Being righteous doesn't give one a free pass through trials--we aren't allowed to avoid them simply because we are doing our best to be good. The righteous face trials everyday.

The bigger question is: how do we treat our trials?  Can we look back when we are released from particularly hard trials and be grateful for them as were Nephi and the Brother of Jared?  

The same week I read these verses I was in an institute class where the teacher was describing the difficulties he and his wife had been through with a drug addict son and then his wife's struggles with chronic illness.  He pointed out how so many of the older generation will use the phrase, "We're grateful for the blessings we enjoy."  But what about "the blessings we don't enjoy?", he asked.

How often do we recognize our trials simply as blessings we don't particularly enjoy?  Can we not be grateful for them too?  This is the great quality that Nephi and the Brother of Jared had; the ability to enjoy their trials and be grateful for the things they were taught.  It is also a quality I have found in many church leaders and their families.  For instance, I have taken a great liking to Sister Kristen Oaks, wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks.  She has become my role model of late for a variety of reasons.  She didn't let her lack of husband or family prevent her from living a very happy life.  Often, when talking of the propensity of those who are single, divorced, widowed, or even married to be bitter or lonely she points out the necessity of counting the blessings available to them and to constantly thank our God for them. 

If you were to spend your whole life looking for someone who had life the easiest, chances are your search would be in vain.  No one has just the life they would like, and we may find that the righteous and the innocent bear the worst of life's trials.  However, you may find that the humble righteous are quicker to respond that they are happy in spite of their trials, just as Nephi was.  He was faithful, grateful, and always obedient, and for that he was blessed with a happy, if not easier life.  Ours will be that way too if we follow his example.